The Liberation of Lowering Your Standards (yes, really)
Lowering my standards was not a graceful journey.
There was no big aha moment. No sudden enlightenment. No peaceful surrender where I floated above the mess like a serene motherhood monk.
It was harder than that.
Because I used to love a clean, tidy home. Like, deeply love it. Clear counters. Fluffed pillows. Floors you could eat off of (though that’s reserved for babies and toddlers). I loved the idea of mise en place when cooking — every ingredient chopped, measured, and placed in its own little bowl like I had my life fully together.
My days were organized. My systems had systems. My standards? Aggressively high.
Then I had a baby.
And instead of immediately relaxing into the chaos, I tightened my grip. I even became a bit of a germophobe — wiping, sanitizing, hovering. Somewhere deep down I believed that if everything stayed clean and controlled, I would feel okay.
Spoiler alert: that didn’t work.
Now I have a toddler, I’m pregnant again, and I live with a level of fatigue that laughs in the face of planners, checklists, and beautifully labeled storage bins.
And slowly — not gracefully — I started letting go.
Lowering my standards has been liberating as hell.
Instead of cleaning during every free moment, I nap with Callie when I’m not working or seeing clients. Instead of chasing an ideal version of “having it all together,” I let the toys live on the floor and the laundry wait.
And wow — the freedom.
What Lowering Your Standards Actually Means
Let’s clear something up gently: lowering your standards doesn’t mean you’ve given up. It doesn’t mean you don’t care. And it definitely doesn’t mean you’re doing life wrong.
For me, it meant shifting my standards from how things look to how things feel.
It meant choosing rest over perfection. Presence over polish. Sanity over sparkle.
And that shift didn’t happen overnight — it happened through small, real-life decisions.
Real-Life Ways to Practice Lowering Your Standards (Without Losing Yourself)
1. Choose the nap or the yoga session
If you’re exhausted and your body is asking for rest, listen. And if gentle movement or a few minutes on your mat feels better, choose that instead. The dishes will wait. The crumbs will survive. Rest or movement — both count when they help you come back to yourself and regulate your nervouse system.
Try this: Ask yourself, “What would help me feel 10% better right now?” If the answer is sleep, nap. If the answer is stretching or a short yoga session, roll out the mat. Either way, you’re taking care of yourself.
2. Shrink the task until it fits your life
Not everything needs to be done fully, perfectly, or all at once.
Instead of: “I need a full workout.”
Try: “I’ll move my body for 7 minutes.”
Instead of: “I need to eat perfectly today.”
Try: “I’ll add one nourishing thing.”
Small counts. Consistency grows from doable.
And honestly, one of the biggest shifts for me was lowering my standards around what a workout had to look like. I used to think movement only counted if it was long, intense, and perfectly planned. But in this season, consistency only happened when I accepted that sometimes a workout is 8 minutes between naps or a quick yoga flow on the living room floor. Letting go of the “perfect workout” is exactly what allowed me to keep showing up at all.
3. Release the timeline
Progress doesn’t require seven perfect days in a row. It doesn’t require streaks, charts, or gold stars.
You can skip days. You can come back. You can even do more when you feel good.
Momentum loves flexibility.
4. Let mess be evidence of life
A messy house often means kids are home, creativity is happening, and people are living inside it.
This season doesn’t need to look Instagram-ready. It needs to feel supportive.
5. Lower the bar — but keep what matters
Lowering standards doesn’t mean lowering your values.
Which brings me to this:
Standards I’m Not Giving Up
Lowering my standards didn’t mean letting go of what actually matters. It meant protecting it.
Here’s what stays non-negotiable for me:
Time with my family
Taking care of my health
Cooking nourishing food for the people I love
Helping other mamas feel less alone and more powerful
Creating micro moments for myself that remind me I’m still a total badass
The spotless house. The perfectly prepped meals. The illusion of doing it all flawlessly?
Those can go.
Because this season isn’t about perfection — it’s about presence.
And honestly? That feels pretty damn Awesome.
With love, naps, and lowered expectations,
Wonder Nat 💥
Co-CEO, Make Me Awesome
Superparent in real life 💛
P.S. If you’ve been waiting for a sign to start small… this is it. Go try a 7-Day Challenge today — your future self (and your nervous system) will thank you.
Here’s why they’re made for real-life parents:
Daily workouts are under 10 minutes
You do NOT have to do 7 days in a row (drop that standard lol)
You can do more than one in a day if you’re feeling extra superparent-y 💪
They’re designed to fit into life as it is — not life when everything is perfect
Tiny doses. Big impact. Zero guilt. REAL MOMENTUM.